Heads Up: Now That's Just Demoralizing.

Here’s the fastest goal in La Liga history, courtesy of Valladolid’s Joseba Llorente. And if were to do what analysts do when a guy hits three home runs on opening day, we’re going to calculate this game’s final combined score… 900 goals! Wow! Although, somehow we don’t think they get there. [YouTube]
The Dodgers and Padres will play an exhibition game in China. They gave us the bird flu, so we’re going to counteract with James Loney fever! [Sporting News]

Yeah, so about those OJ Mayo tickets—his coach, Tim Floyd, said he okay’d Mayo getting those tickets from Carmelo Anthony, so any beef the NCAA has, it has with the coach; not the player or the school. That, friends, is called taking a bullet for the greater good. [ESPN]
Hm, so Shaq leads a team to an NBA championship, and now it’d be better if he left the team so they can rebuild? Laker fans are having pretty trippy flashbacks right now. [Sun-Sentinal]
Here’s a post about how the NFL and binge drinking have formed a bond that hasn’t been seen since the first pre-frosh tapped a keg decades ago. [Joe Sports Fan]