Heads Up: Hey, We Won A Kid. Weird.

Friday’s are supposed to be filled with amusement, so a terrified child trapped in an arcade game at a shopping mall somewhere in trashville is the kind of belly-juggling laughter that we’re in the mood. Awww, look. He’s crying. [YouTube]
Congress wants to investigate Jose Canseco’s steroid connection to Alex Rodriguez. His name is “Max” and that’s all Canseco is willing to disclose. Does he happen to look twelve, have black freckles strewn about his visage and embraces a snarling grin? [NYTimes]

Garbage Pale Kids projected the future of sports? Get out of your roach-infested trash bin, for realz? [Food Court Lunch]
Jennifer Aniston is making one major league pitcher talk about “her eyes and hair and…demeanor.” Yeah. Demeanor. What we all look for. [Hollyscoop]
UCLA’s Kevin Love says goodbye to the collegiate circuit and hello to the NBA. Envy pelts us in the eye because we wish we were still in college. [MSN]