What you missed this week while you were chasing a dog around a soccer pitch.

• Cristiano Ronaldo breaks a fan’s wrist and the dude commends him for it.
• That damn Boston fan and his damn wannabe curse! Actually, it was awesome.
• Eva Longoria is looking hotter than ever. Damn you, Tony Parker.
• Andruw Jones is a fatass, but he’s blaming his cleats for his extra weight.
• The 2008 NFL schedule is out!
• Once voluptuously delicious, Anna Kournikova is rapidly melting away.
• Nuns are trying to tap into that Dominican baseball market.
• Tequila bottles aesthetically pleasing, making the inebriation process even better. Yeah, we didn’t know that was possible either.
• Eli Manning is getting hitched in Cabo San Lucas, Mexico this weekend and we’re positive we’ll be up early Sunday morning looking for pictures.
• The David Ortiz jersey that was buried at the new Yankee Stadium has already reached the auction price of $30K.

Image [Getty]