We kid, numbskulls. That angle is Splash News’ fault and we’re too lazy to change it. Also, at first glance we thought Cristiano’s ass was really white. But then we realized it was his board shorts. Nereida Gallardo was found on the beach screaming. With horror. And naked. Very, very naked. The end.

The moment of impact [Gawker]
Image [Splash, via Gawker]