Ah that England squad. Enjoying the summer when the rest of the world is taking shin kicks and swapping sweaty jerseys. Peter Crouch was enjoying the beach with his bodaciously busty lover Abbey Clancy. And Rio Ferdinand is in Nigeria counting goats. Where’s spitfire capitano John Terry? Obviously you can tell he’s rockin’ the most overrated and expensive happiest place on earth. Seriously, those ears and that suit are so John Terry. What’s that? Oh, he’s the white guy. Our bad.

Vacay: John Terry and Mickey [Kickette]
Image [Keystone]