If Latrell Sprewell taught us anything about player/manager fights, it’s that violence against coaches never ends well. At all. Now, we have Shawn Chacon to add to the list of dumbasses that ended their own careers prematurely.

After being demoted to the bullpen this week, Chacon was asked to partake in a meeting with Houston Astros’ GM Eddie Wade after Chacon had reportedly engaged in an altercation with Astros’ manager Cecil Cooper. Wade wanted to talk about “stuff” and Chacon was all “Hell nah, biatch! Tell me here, right now, right this minute.” /Snapping fingers. Chacon’s implosion after the jump.

“I said, ‘What do you want to speak to me about?’ ” Chacon said. “He said, ‘We just want to talk to you.’ I said, ‘Anything you can say, you can say to me right here. I don’t want to go to the office.’ He looked at me, and I said, ‘There’s nothing for me to say to you guys.’ And I don’t think whatever they had to say to me they were going to make me happy. I didn’t want to get in a closed-room conversation.”

“I sat down to eat, and Ed Wade came to me and very sternly said, ‘You need to come with me to the office.’ I said, ‘For what? I don’t want to go to the office with you and Cooper.’ And I said, ‘You can tell me whatever you’ve got to tell me right here.’ He’s like, ‘Oh, you want me to tell you right here?’ And I said, ‘Yeah.’ I’m not yelling. I’m calm.”

It deteriorated quickly afterward, according to Chacon.

“He started yelling and cussing,” Chacon said of Wade. “I’m sitting there, and I said to him very calmly, ‘Ed, you need to stop yelling at me. Then I stood up and said, ‘You better stop yelling at me.’ I stood up. He continued and was basically yelling and stuff and was like, ‘You need to (expletive) look in the mirror.’ So at that point I lost my cool, and I grabbed him by the neck and threw him to the ground. I jumped on top of him, because at that point I wanted to beat his (behind). Words were exchanged.”

Reminds of “The Stranger”, when the chaplain visits Meursault on death row and ultimately pushes the mild-mannered character to rip his head off via cussing. Anyway, Chacon went from zero to fucking psychopath in ten seconds. It’s also the same amount of time Chacon kissed his career goodbye for good.

Astros pitcher Chacon attacks GM [Chron]