When we received an email this morning from Milwaukee Brewers’ Spanish-speaking sports announcer Juan Lozano, the first thing we thought was, “there’s a Spanish radio station in Milwaukee?” Oh yeah, dudes. And people listen. Good Karma broadcasting and ESPN...

Everyone has been speculating as to how much dough Cynthia Rodriguez stands to gain from her inevitable divorce from Alex Rodriguez. Considering he’s the richest baseball player in the history of the league, Cynthia is sure to be receiving...

So remember earlier in the day when we told you that Manny Ramirez was about to be dealt to Florida… yeah, he’s not. But he still has to pack his bags because he’s moving from Boston to Los Angeles....

Being the reigning Wimbledon champion has many perks. First, hot girlfriend probably loves you more. Second, you get an asteroid named after you because you’re that amazing. Three, you get to tell the people that put on these tournaments...

It’s great to find another analogy to describe what our head feels like after a night of drinking. “Dude, my noggin’ feels like it was smashed by a…er…um…a giant soccer ball. [With Leather] The Indian dudes that brought you...

Mixed Martial Arts has its fair share of oddly named ailments that range from “ringworm” to “Cauliflower ear.” The latter is a sort of staple in Mixed Martial Arts because of the ear’s noticeable disfigurement. Cauliflower effects a lot...

So if you haven’t noticed, what with the flurry of trade chatter on the wire, the MLB trading deadline is today at four EST (right before Jude Judy!). While we have one big trade essentially done (Ken Griffey, Jr....

Papa Joe Simpson professed to reporters last week that his Daisy-dukin’ daughter would soon arrive in Oxnard, Ca to cheer on her quarterback boyfriend and her “favorite team”, and, as these photos attest, she arrived. Is this the demise...

It’s not necessarily news that Cristiano Ronaldo added two giant orgy-tubs to his mansion this week, but it is news that people consider the revamping of his crib to mean that there’s finally signs Cristiano may stay in Manchester...

Interesting story coming out of Arizona about a kid who snagged a pre-historic looking “Alligator Gar” in a lake. Alligator Gars are totally not kosher in Arizona, but somehow, one ended up in a lake in the great sandy...

You always hope the youngsters on the roster use preseason action to gain a little confidence for the regular season and it appears that Carlos Vela is doing just that. The 19 year old bagged his fourth goal of...

What is the sound of one arm swimming? Well, if you were around the English Channel yesterday, you might have heard it because that’s when one-armed French carpenter Olivier Desmet tried to swim it. The 56-year-old Desmet, who lost...

Other than let’s say a chess tournament, a national polo tournament in front of the Prince of England and Hermione from Harry Potter is probably the most inappropriate event you could choose to streak. But of course, some guy...

Whas Happened In Sports Last Night Superliga: Shalrie Joseph sent the New England Revolution to the Superliga final where they will face off with MLS counterparts, the Houston Dynamo. This is actually the best of both worlds, folks. Since...

Ah, to be Formula 1 kingpin Flavio Briatore for a day. Despite being incredibly homely, he’s married to the woman pictured here, Wonderbra model Elisabetta Gregoraci, knocked boots with Naomi Campbell and has a kid with Heidi Klum (apparently...

Paola Espinoza is heading to her second Summer Olympic Games and will compete for the Mexican National diving team. The Baja Califas residient is only 22 (Her birthday is tomorrow so send her a card will ya?), but she...

As you can see, the Martin Jetpack that was unveiled in Oshkosh, Wisconsin yesterday is full of raw power that can lift a human body off the ground and make two guys run around like idiots right next to...

Lawsuits are now an American pastime, but the most zealous sports fanatic in the US wouldn’t dare to wage a legislative war against the owner of a major sports franchise. Yet, who would have the audacity to do such...

An athlete is absolutely nothing this day in age without luxurious amenities that make the rest of the world immensely envious. Take every single damn report we have about Cristiano Ronaldo. He gets all the girls. He has loads...

In a Pedro Cerrano voice, if you will: If ju are looking for some really crappy webcams, the ju have come to the right place. This Averatec Laptop Notebook USB Webcam is just about the ugliest thing we’ve ever...

We made this mistake a few years back when we went camping. Ever try and grab the muffler of a dune-buggie after you’ve managed to topple it over a hill? Don’t try it. Apparently, there are serious consequences when...

Barcelona—the team, not the city—must be in a pretty cranky mood today. You have to be any time you A) lose a battle with your league and B) thoughts of this happening to your most prized player while not...

It must be a hard life going from Major League Baseball reliever to Fresno farm league grunt. Former Seattle reliever and current San Francisco Giants’ farm league pitcher Julio Mateo was arrested this week after he was caught giving...

Does Kobe Bryant need a hug? Almost two months after getting blown out by the Celtics in the NBA Finals, Kobe still hasn’t seemed to have gotten over it. How do we know? Because when the Olympian was asked...

The most famous of multi-sport professionals are Bo Jackson and Deion Sanders. They epitomized the definition of athlete. Yet, Deion Sanders’ legacy impacts us a lot more when we realize the guy’s gone on to own an Arena football...

The hot tech rumor today has to do with the next version of the iPod nano, namely what size and shape it will be. This render comes to us by way of iLounge, one of the more trustworthy sites...

This goal is the equivalent of hitting that wide-open three and proceeding to throw your hands up in the air proclaiming that you’re the greatest wide-open three point hitter that ever lived. “It’s like butta baby”, says your strut...

Oxnard. It’s the sleazy little, “Madlib” supported town that you may have noticed on your way to Santa Barbara. They have outlets there and an airport. You may also recognize it from that one scene in “Sideways” where Paul...

Soccer riots have a long history of being about stupid shit. Either someone talked smack about another dude’s girlfriend or a group (or six) of rows decide to start throwing fascist salutes all over the place. But occasionally, a...

So the Celtics’ Paul Pierce (aka Crack, aka Stabby McStabbersons) is currently in Madrid to promote whatever it is recent NBA Champs promote overseas—or maybe give impoverished kids 2008 Lakers Championship T-shirts to run it in LA’s face. Whatever...

Whas Happened In Sports Last Night MLB: Carlos Zambrano paved the way for the Chicago Cubs to pulverize their NL Central counterparts. Isn’t that sentence mystifying? Not this year. The Cubs scored five runs in the fifth-inning to steal...

Soccer Donut Stunt Since we’re about t-minus three hours from boarding a jet plane and heading off the trembling terror that is Tinseltown, we thought a video of a girl sending a soccer ball through Inglewood’s famous “Randy’s Donuts” sculpture...

We haven’t written about Cristiano Ronaldo in quite a while without mentioning some WAG-wannabee, but an interesting story came over our RSS feed reading “Ferguson: If Ronaldo leaves, I will too.” It was bound to happen considering going to...

Well let’s jump right into, shall we? Manny Ramirez minced no words on Sunday when he told reporters that he really didn’t care if Boston would re-sign him the following season. Of course, this means, above all, that Manny...

The Brazilian volleyball dude getting a facial is named Emmanuel and apparently he’s a very talented player. So talented that he never gets his sunglasses or hate knocked off his head by a scorching spike. “He got it good.”...

Richard Branson is officially having way too much with all of his money. Since Virgin isn’t a sponsor of ours, we can’t really say that we love their on-flight entertainment options. We can’t tell you how much we enjoy...

Looking for a way to merge, let’s say, Fox En Espanol and Fox Soccer Channel? Well, it looks like Televisa is releasing a new soccer channel combining everything you want a Spanish soccer channel to have, plus some added...

You know why we love our generation? Because people splice up ol’ Bert & Ernie clips that once made us giggle and turn them into head bobbin’, gangsta shoutin’ clips of brilliance. Seriously, how can you not get down...

So how many diseases do you reckon Cristano Ronaldo has? More or less than the average athlete? We ask because the general consensus at the MachoChip HQ is that he’s had more ass in the past three months than...

Guitar Hero is not just for lazy, drunken parties any more. (Though there’s nothing wrong with those, of course.) Blackwater, the private military contractor, is putting together a video game package for troops in Afghanistan. The package includes an...

When we first began reading about the death of Argentine Esteban Neira during the NYC Triathalon last week, we thought it was a solitary case. But when we read on and found out it was the fourth death this...

This is reminiscent of last Monday’s goal in which a goalkeeper miscalculated the springboard action of the grass in front of him, only to see the ball surge over his head and into the back of the net. The...

Sasha Vujacic has been making the rounds around Machochip like a bikini clad cheerleader. From European contract rumors to Laker Girls having absolutely no idea how to spell his name, Vujacic has been a favorite topic for us this...

There was a time in baseball before free agency when players used to actually fear for their livelihoods. There were no guaranteed contracts or multi-million dollar endorsement deals for anyone. This is the time that former relief pitcher, and...

Whas Happened In Sports Last Night MLS: Why can’t there be more Monday night football soccer? Toronto lead the charge against Real Salt Lake, scoring first in the 63rd minute of play, but Real’s 84th and 87th minute goals...

Did you know that today was the day “Not The LA Times” was unveiled for all of us to read? It’s a blog very much like-minded to that of “The Onion”, poking fun at everything and anything that is...

We had a hard time doing anything this weekend besides reading tons of Bukowski, drinking some cheladas and watching Mexican soccer, so when our boss told us about Comic-Con, we realized we were already too damn late to do...

So what’s more demeaning to the people you’re competing against—posing as a handicapped person or a woman to gain some perceived competitive edge during a race? Well, while the former is only a plot point in movies (we hope),...

Barcelona tropicalista and rhythm conductor “El Guincho”, a.k.a. Pablo Díaz-Reixa, is finally coming to the United States via Young Turks/XL Recordings on October 7. This song is known as “Kalise” and it’s on his already-out-in-Europe-but-forthcoming-to-the-United States album “Alegranza!” We...

As much as we rib Carlos Tevez around here, there are two absolutes about the man—one, he’s ugly as sin (hey, we didn’t say we were going to stop ribbing him). But probably more importantly, he’s a winner, with...