We knew the thread on this story would go somewhere infested by celebritards. If you haven’t heard, Cristiano Ronaldo is currently in Los Angeles on an undisclosed business trip and he’s been wandering through LA with buddies, on crutches and looking all Europe-y. He’s single now, so he’s basically transported to the best place on earth to find a rebound. But, is there any chance, whatsoever, that an extremely annoying socialite with giant feet and no and talent could actually have the chance to snag Cristiano away from Nereida Gallardo? God, can we be more dramatic? Of course, we can. While Nereida is sunbathing in Mallorca and playing doctor with her girlfriends, Cristiano is was dodging advances from one, Paris Hilton. Oooooo. Roll it!

Football superstar Cristiano Ronaldo turned down Paris Hilton after she made a play for him at a Hollywood nightclub, MailOnline has learned.

The Manchester United striker - currently in LA on an undisclosed business trip - arrived at trendy hotspot Villa in the early hours of Wednesday morning.

A source said: ‘Paris was all over him. The moment he arrived, she went over to his private table.

‘At one point, she pushed her chest together and made a point of trying to snuggle up against him.

‘But Ronaldo clearly wasn’t interested in Paris. He turned his back on her.’

It’s not that difficult to walk away from blandness, is it? Whatever, we never ever ever want to think of Paris Hilton as a WAG, so ku-dos, brotha man. You spared us future stick figure jokes and anorexia references.

EXCLUSIVE: Ronaldo snubs Paris Hilton during late night frolics at Hollywood club [Daily Mail]
Image [Celebbuzz]