Well, Excuuse Us—Transgendered Golfer Lana Lawless Writes Machochip To Tell Us How Dumb We Are
We at Machochip are nothing if but a forum for people’s thoughts (and ass pictures). So when transgendered golfer Lana Lawless dropped us an email this morning about our post yesterday highlighting her past, we were excited, especially since it started out like this:
Where in the hell do you get off writing that crap about me…
Sweet. It turns out that Lawless had a problem with one of our jokes. Lawless was quoted as saying she let gay perps walk during her dude days working a gang unit in Rialto, California, so we got all Law and Order and said straight guys s/he sent to jail might use it as fodder to get out. So her email was to clarify a few things, and while she was at it, call us a few names.
Read the rest of her email, and our response, after the jump.
you didn’t do the interview. so you just take things out of context like that other reporter…do you really think I let gay criminals go..I would of been fired for one and second how would I of known who’s gay…gay people don’t say hello officer I’m gay..I was telling him that in my past life I was a different person..and while laughing I said ” oh yeah I was a real peach, I let all the gay people go”…IE: a joke…ha, ha meaning I was a jerk in my past life. I can’t even count the people of all races and both genders that I just gave a traffic warning to rather than a ticket, sorry if you weren’t one of the lucky one’s…..anything to make me look bad right…just print anything, it doesn’t have to be the truth…!
You know nothing about my life..like it or not I am legally a female and the USGA said I can compete in the women’s division because I am a woman…….period don’t you think just maybe the USGA did a little more research on the subject than you or any of your readers…please get educated before you run off at the mouth.
I served my country, I served my community receiving numerous awards for bravery and helping people…..all that means nothing because I had a sex change and play women’s golf,,,come on, what does it mean to you… nothing .. I WOULD RATHER YOU AND EVERYBODY ELSE SIMPLY SAID ” THANK YOU ” as you pass by..
Well, if you’ll allow us to retort. We just watched Milk, and if Dan White (Spoiler Alert!) can kill Harvey Milk and the Mayor of San Fransisco without getting the death penalty because of the “Twinkie Defense,” then anything is possible in the court of law. Lawyers chomp at the bit at any perceived bias to get their clients out of jail, so you don’t think that—even as a joke—suggesting that you let gay people go because of their sexual orientation won’t have some ripple effect on the cases you worked?
And it is true that we know nothing about your life… except what is found in the press once you decided to become a unique public figure. If we made a mistake, thank you for letting us know. But the fact is that you stated that the medications you’ve taken have decreased your muscle mass and sapped your power. Um, in our book that is what we called it—the opposite of steroids. And we never belittled the USGA for allowing transgendered competitors, far from it. We love the inclusiveness. We only chuckled at the fact their bylaws had made your drug testing so radically different and contrary to other sports.
As for you, Ms. Lawless, you sound like an awesome person who sounds like the life of the party. At least you’d have a lot of stories to tell. We do salute you for trying to clean up the streets of Rialto and being an ultimate hard-ass. But you have to learn that when you say things to the press that you knew were going to come after your story, you can’t waiver and say things were a joke. Twinkies are made out of junk like that.
Earlier: She’s A Man, Baby… Transgendered Golfer Lana Lawless Is Ready To Get Her Link On The Links
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Hmm. I wonder if Ms. Lawless has has her birth certificate changed to reflect her new female status. I believe that that has happened legally in various states. If so, i wonder if she could get married legally as a female. She should try, to my knowledge there are not too many states (if any) in which that happened. That would be a good test case.
Posted by S. Tony | December 24, 2008
Sex changes, surrogate mothers, test tube babies, assisted suicide…. I know that there is an honest difference of opinion from mine, but in that vein, I’ll lay claim to the same protection. Mine is an honest difference of opinion from what I consider the secular generation. We’re playing God here, and even if you put that whole evangelical thing away (which I’m not even playing), the point remains that we are toying with what is in order to make what we want, and we aren’t very good at it. Think of an amateur painter. And there are ethical questions. Who are the parents of a test tube baby? What gender association does a child make if Mommy used to be Sir. And it goes on and on. With regards to Ms.Lawless, I’d say that her golly-dee-whiz happiness needs to take a back seat to the societal fabric.
Posted by Chris | December 26, 2008
Stop yourself before you end up sounding more ignorant than you already are. You clearly do not understand the concept of transgendered individuals (did you know it has NOTHING to do with being gay or not?). Gender and sexuality are separate concepts. Stop harassing this poor woman for being something that you do not understand.
Posted by A. Nonymous | December 27, 2008
“…I WOULD RATHER YOU AND EVERYBODY ELSE SIMPLY SAID ” THANK YOU ” as you pass by..”
You stole my line Mrs. Doubtfire.
Posted by Col. Nathan R. Jessep | December 27, 2008
“…I WOULD RATHER YOU AND EVERYBODY ELSE SIMPLY SAID ” THANK YOU ” as you pass by..”
You stole my line Mrs. Doubtfire.
Posted by Col. Nathan R. Jessep | December 27, 2008
Wow impressive grammar and spelling, Lana…
“I would of been fired for one and second how would I of known who’s gay” ????
I know it’s an e-mail so I’ll forgive all of the punctuation and whatnot, but…. the phrase “would of been” is simply inexcusable
Alas…
Posted by JoeFish | December 27, 2008
people who respond to arguments or e-mails by pointing out grammatical errors are a dime a dozen and really just waste time and space.
Posted by shane | December 28, 2008
Transgendered seems to be cosmetic at best. My narrow understanding is, that orientation aside. if you take a blood sample the reading will tell you the subject’s true sexual identity.
Posted by beldar conehead | December 28, 2008
Tony … I was born in Indiana and when I presented my surgery letters to the Vital Records department, the Stateof Indiana changed my gender from male to female on my bitrh certificate.And, no .. even thought I was previously married to a woman for 25 years, I can no longer legally marry a woman
Chris .. I dont know Ms Lawless personally, but if you think people make the choice to finally live their lives without thought, prayer and two letters from mental health providers, you need to do some research. I am a Christian and will answer to God for my choices in life, just like you will.
A … well said.
Col … You need to read also. Mrs/ Doubtfire does not deal with reality. It’s a movie, for pete’s sake.
Joe … are you related to Country Joe and the Fish?
Beldar et al … may I suggest www.lynnconway.com
Posted by 3-putt | January 04, 2009
Tony … I was born in Indiana and when I presented my surgery letters to the Vital Records department, the Stateof Indiana changed my gender from male to female on my bitrh certificate.And, no .. even thought I was previously married to a woman for 25 years, I can no longer legally marry a woman
Chris .. I dont know Ms Lawless personally, but if you think people make the choice to finally live their lives without thought, prayer and two letters from mental health providers, you need to do some research. I am a Christian and will answer to God for my choices in life, just like you will.
A … well said.
Col … You need to read also. Mrs/ Doubtfire does not deal with reality. It’s a movie, for pete’s sake.
Joe … are you related to Country Joe and the Fish?
Beldar et al … may I suggest www.lynnconway.com
Posted by 3-putt | January 04, 2009