Spanish blabber-mouth and universally declared racist Luis Aragones and his boys have conquered their Euro tournament demons by implementing a textbook strategy of passing to the guy that’s open and cutting down the field, and stifling the German offense...

Whas Happened In Sports This Weekend Euro 2008: Some people may call Italy’s style of defensive play effective, but we thought it was boring. In the end, Spain triumphed on the prowess of Iker Casillas at goal. Trust us,...

What better way to celebrate your incapacity to partake in the most prestigious continental tournament in Europe than by visiting an African village and achieving chiefdom. Since Rio Ferdinand can’t captain a mediocre team, he’s managed to convince a...

Unless officials want a Sunday poisoning, kidnapping or old fashioned stoning to ruin their day, UEFA had better received a stamp of approval from former KGB hitman democratically elected president Vladimir Putin for their Moscow-themed ball. We know he...

That’s it. We’ve had it. One more match-fixing scandal investigation and we’ll turn this into a blog about Telenovelas. Well, oh oh alright. What the hell. One more. Uefa reps are looking into possible match-fixing within their prestigious Euro...

Matchday 5 of European Champions’ League clashes are about to start and we’re as hyped as that one time we waited five hours to see Rage Against The Machine. Well, it might not be that exciting since it’s merely...

Matchday 5 has come to an end, but not without it’s fair share of shockers. It took a whole 90 minutes, but Cristiano finally knocked in that goal we predicted. Barcelona vs. Lyon was a bit of a shocker,...

Uefa Champions’ League soccer is upon us once again and we’re as siked as a California beach bunny getting a tan. Matchday 5 can either make your or break you, so we’re taking a glance at the most scintillating...

England’s loss against Croatia on Wednesday ended any and all hopes for a British birth in the finals of Euro 2008. We weren’t shocked by the loss, but Croatia’s vigor and ease made us wonder how they could walk...

It’s being dubbed as “the last roll of the dice” for Steve McCLaren tonight when England face off with Croatia in Euro 2008 qualifiers. England are in a must win situation and it’s the axe if McCLaren’s side doesn’t...

Whas Happened In Sports Last Night MLS Cup: The Houston Dynamo capture their second consecutive championship and it was the only time we’ve EVER rooted for a Texas team. New England Revolution 1, Houston 2. [CNN] Euro 2008: Israel’s...

That’s what ex-English national team defender Paul Parker thinks. England’s paranoiathon is reaching it’s boiling point with more than a few coaches and players simultaneously pointing their fingers at foreigners as the cause for recent misery. That’s rich. England...

While interim England captain Steven Gerrard is out bashing the foreigners and distancing himself from his country’s impending doom, Scotland striker James McFadden is mesmerized by the idea of possibly taking out world champions Italy this weekend. If the...

VfB Stuttgart player Mario Gómez scored a goal this weekend with his penis. No word if the penis will take all the credit, or if Gómez will attribute the goal to God. “The Penis Of God?” Doesn’t have much...

We came across the November edition of England’s Esquire mag and smack on the cover was Brazilian star Kaká. When it comes to a supermodel’s life, the AC Milan star is taking steps to join the ranks of the...

You have to admit that a Euro 2008 tournament without England would be like a World Cup tournament without Brazil. Well, everyone, prepare for it. England head coach Steve Mclaren thought he bulked up on experience by recalling Los...

It’s no mistake that English national team head coach Steve Mclaren is off his rocker, his high horse, or whatever else he can be thrown from. Mclaren has recalled David Beckham to his squad of 26 for England’s Euro...

Manchester United V Dynamo Kiev: 4-0 Final Cristiano Ronaldo decided to poke his pretty little face out in the 88th minute and score a goal to solidify a Manchester United’s arse-whoopin’ of Dynamo Kiev. Looks like them foreign-born players...

We love this video of a team’s fan really getting into the action. No, seriously, he’s on the field heading a goal out of the net. Unfortunately, we weren’t able to find out which teams these were, but deciphering...

Whas Happened In Sports Last Night European Champions’ League: Liverpool 8, Besiktas 0. It was an amazing display of…wait…who the hell is Besiktas? Do it against someone we know and we’ll talk. [Goal] European Champions’ League: Real Madrid coach...

German World Cup champ and national cheerleader Franz Beckenbauer has publicly scrutinized England’s national fútbol team by saying they play like schoolchildren. The Brits faced Germany in August and lost 2-1 in front of a sellout crowd at Wembley...

So Russian fans decided to cast some voodoo spells on the English national team to help them win. Um, bruja, I think it worked. Russian fans resorted to bizarre measures for success, hiring a voodoo priestess to curse three...