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Maria Sharapova Shows Off Her California Style  ||  Well, Excuuse Us—Transgendered Golfer Lana Lawless Writes Machochip To Tell Us How Dumb We Are  ||  Former Playmate Maria Checa IsThe Hottest Insider Trader... Ever  ||  Mexican Newscaster Geraldine Bazan Creates A Newsflash In Our Pants
TuesdayOctober142008

Goal Of The Day: Kaka Joins In The Brazilian Qualifying Fun

Yesterday we brought you Robinho’s awesome topside goal against Venezuela in Brazil’s 4-0 win during their qualifying match. Today it’s time for us to show Kaka’s high volley into the top part of the net. You know, their record...

MondaySeptember082008

Kaká Is Manchester City's Next 'Galactico' Possibility

There’s no reason to illustrate a superfluous point when it comes to Manchester City’s latest signings and possible future signings. The way they manage their team will likely achieve the same trophy count that Real Madrid acquired during the...

ThursdayJune122008

Kaká's New Baby Boy Luca Will Be Dribbling In Months

Kaká and wife Caroline delivered a healthy boy on Tuesday. Our homegirls at Kickette acquired the pics and made two great points: 1) How the hell did a deal for these pictures go through so quickly. 2) How in...

MondayMay192008

Kaká Denied Champions League And The Olympics

It’s safe to say that the former is the greater loss. AC Milan stumbled during the last weekend of Serie A action and finished a dismal fifth, leaving them well out of Champions League contention for next year. That...

ThursdayApril032008

Kaká Makes A Lot More Money Than David Beckham, And Every Other Soccer Player On Earth

Everyone thought David Beckham’s $250 million over six years would place him at the pinnacle of the most lavishly paid ball kickers in the world list. Apparently, that’s not the case. Tops bragging rights go to none other than...

FridayFebruary292008

Anchor Doesn't Know Her Milan From Her Millen

AC Milan’s Kaka signed a two year extension that will keep him at the San Siro until 2013. It’s a good thing Kaka didn’t take the bait from ol’ Reel Madrid. Gotta hand it to them Milliners for signing...

TuesdayFebruary262008

Kaka Is Foul

What’s the easiest way to stop the reigning Footballer of the Year from exasperating your defense? Fouls. A kick to the shin will stop anyone. If you’re lucky, (or Birmingham), you’ll even knock out the threatening player by shattering...

WednesdayFebruary062008

Goal Of The Day: Kaka Goes Coast To Coast Against Argentina.

When Argentina and Brazil get together, you can always expect the best of the best. Unfortunately for Argentina in 2006, they decided to let Kaka & Company show off why they were the better team. Kaka goes coast to...

TuesdayJanuary292008

Heads Up: Only Heroin Addicts Can Blame It On The Balloons.

Hey, at least they weren’t beer bottles, flares, or those £1 British coins. Those are heavy—and they hurt like hell when you chuck them from the stands. [YouTube] The New York Times has taken the time to evaluate—and consequentally...

MondayJanuary142008

Kaká Never Expected The Brazilian Inquisition

Who knew that religion could get people into so much trouble? AC Milan star Kaká is being questioned by the Brazilian high court because his church is in the middle of a fraud investigation. It turns out the founders...

FridayDecember212007

If We Changed Our Name To Machito, We'd Totally Win Every Web Award Around Like Kaká

Christmas time is coming up, and as happy as you think you’ll be away from work, around day four you’re itching to go back from boredom. Well, this is where we come in. We previously introduced you to Soccer...

TuesdayDecember182007

Cristiano Ronaldo And Kaká: It's Like Porn For Sporting Directors.

Manchester United winger Cristiano Ronaldo and AC Milan midfielder Kaká share a giggle during the FIFA World Player of the Year award ceremony: Kaká: Did you really have sex with hookers? Cristiano Ronaldo: Don’t believe everything you read in...

TuesdayDecember182007

Kaká Continues To Crap On The Competition

AC Milan’s Kaká better make some more room in his closet. The chosen one was chosen yet again and presented with the FIFA Player of the Year award yesterday to go along with his Ballon d’Or. And like for...

MondayDecember172007

World Club Cup: So An Argentine, Italian and Brazilian Walk Into A Bar...

After all that crap about hatching a plan to stop Kaká last week, Boca Juniors put up the type of fight you would see between a bully and a blind kid. The one-sided affair was capped off by an...

FridayDecember142007

Boca Juniors Plans To Stop Kaka From Scoring By Stating Their Players Are Better; Lero Lero Lero.

The FIFA World Club Cup Final is set, with Boca Juniors of Argentina scheduled to face Italian giants AC Milan in Japan this weekend (Sunday: the buck-crack of dawn). There’s no question, the bad blood between the two teams...

ThursdayDecember132007

No Immediate Plans To Stop Dreaming About Real Madrid For Kaká

AC Milan midfielder Kaká has definitely found an odd way to distance himself from rumors that he’s on the move from Milan. In an interview with Spanish newspaper Marca, Kaká revealed that he’s in no way ever leaving Milanilandia...

TuesdayDecember112007

"Boca Juniors Is Argentinian So I Want To Win," Says Really Popular Brazilian Soccer Player

Can you guess who? AC Milan midfielder, and reigning European Footballer Of The Year, Kaka has made it clear he’s going after Boca Juniors with the vigor of 1000 Brazilians. The Brazilian star made no qualms about reaffirming that...

ThursdayDecember062007

Kaká & Company Land In Japan, Forget About Eating And Sleeping

AC Milan are getting ready for their semi-final clash against Japanese J-League side Urawa Reds in what will most likely be a bump in the road towards the World Club final against Boca Juniors. That’s what everyone expects. But,...

TuesdayDecember042007

Maradona Crazy Watch: Diego Doesn't Like Kaká.

Diego Maradona wants to make it clear to the entire world that he’s not going away any time soon; or ever. He recently divulged his disgust with Kaká’s triumph over Lionel Messi as the new Footballer of the Year....

MondayDecember032007

And So It Is Written: Kaká Is Footballer Of The Year

As the tea leaves predicted earlier, France Football magazine’s Golden Ball award was passed yesterday to AC Milan’s Kaká. He edged out noted author and Manchester United winger Cristiano Ronaldo and Francesco Totti’s choice, Lionel Messi. “This is very...

ThursdayNovember292007

Italian Striker Francesco Totti Thinks Lionel Messi Is Better Than Kaká

In sports, most awards are typically meaningless. They’re usually handed out to glamour-whores, inevitably propelling recipients to endorsement deals and amplified fame. It’s kind of like how corporations created Valentine’s Day. Bastards. But sometimes we like the awards: specifically...

TuesdayNovember272007

Kaká Spawns, Set To Have The Next Evangelical Soccer Icon

Kaká’s woman, Caroline Celico, confirmed yesterday that she’s carrying her husbands first boy in her belly. “Yes, I am expecting a boy, and I am very happy,” Celico said. Ain’t that a relief. In five months we can expect...

WednesdayNovember212007

Kaká Is Mad At You, Us And Everyone Else Who Wrote About His Possible Breakup With Italy

Kaká wasn’t too thrilled when media outlets all over the planet began to run his comments about possibly leaving Italian Serie A club AC Milan because of the recent violence. He’s been so ticked about all the coverage that...

MondayNovember192007

Kaká Blasts Goal, Funky Music Ensues

We’re not sure if this video is fascinating because of Kaká’s awesome goal, or because the music that follows reminds us of old “Voltron” cartoons where the superhero dudes (and dudette) unleash their powers. It’s cold, our coffee is...

MondayNovember192007

Kaká Says Cristiano Ronaldo Is The Best Player In The World; Cristiano Responds, "I Know"

Even though AC Milan’s Kaká is expected to pick up this year’s Fifa World Player of the Year award, he said that Cristiano Ronaldo should be the one standing at the podium. Why? The Brazilian coverboy and Jesus ambassador...

WednesdayNovember142007

Kaká Considers Leaving Italy, Real Madrid Prez Drops Bocadillo And Heads To The Phone

Kaká, Italy’s highest paid player, recently disclosed his concern over the latest episode of soccer violence in Italian football. It didn’t take too long for the Brazilian star to consider jumping ship and heading towards calmer waters—ahem, cue Madrid....

TuesdayNovember132007

Kaká Preaches To Italy After Fan Shooting

After the tragic shooting of a 26 year-old Italian soccer fan on Sunday, AC Milan superstar Kaká has voiced his concern that in the future, great players from around the world are going to steer clear from Italy. “All...

FridayNovember092007

Move Over Beckham. AC Milan Player Kaká: Soccer's New Fashionista And Jesus Ambassador

We came across the November edition of England’s Esquire mag and smack on the cover was Brazilian star Kaká. When it comes to a supermodel’s life, the AC Milan star is taking steps to join the ranks of the...

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